I guess it dates me, but I just cannot hear the words nomination and award without thinking of Sally Field. “You like me. You really, really like me.” When I was little people always told me that I looked like her and then I put on about five hundred pounds and folks would say I looked like Kathleen Turner. Tonight, though, a mom I met while watching Elizabeth play her first pick up game with girls at her new high school, told me that I looked like Luke, so perhaps I am on an up-swing. Regardless, THANK YOU, Valarie Kinney (check out her cool self at http://organizingchaosandothermisadventures.wordpress.com), for nominating me for the LIEBSTER AWARD. Yay, ME. Let’s get started!

The rules (eh, I am so not a rules person, but I am gonna try):

Eleven random facts. Eleven? I think I might be more about even numbers. Okay, wait, rules. I think I can, I think I can:

1. My secret bad for you food is a filet o’ fish sandwich from McDonalds. I swear I ate those everyday when I was pregnant… that and grape juice over crushed ice in a tall, thin glass, with a straw. I could eat a filet o’ fish every day of my life and be content to never eat anything else.

2. I had Luke at 25 and Quinn at 39. If you are wondering if there is a difference, there is. For example, no one laughed out loud when I told them I was pregnant with Luke.

3. When I was in Florida last week, my husband custom built and installed three new doors upstairs and painted our bedroom a deep, deep plum so that when I walk into it I am reminded of summer and nighttime all at once (until I step on any myriad of toys that are on the ground and then I remember that we are living in a shit hole).

4. The worst thing that has happened to me in a very long while is that we left Quinn’s teddybear at the Tuscana Resort in Florida. I could not sleep last night, sick about it, so sick that this morning when I took Elizabeth to work, I pulled over the car and puked all over the parkway. It might have just been the vodka from the night before, but I told the two men who watched me from their porch that I was pregnant. Pregnant sounds better than hungover.

5. The best thing that has happened in quite sometime is that an anonymous Facebook friend read about poor Teddy and when we walked out onto our porch this afternoon, there was a red cardboard box there, addressed to Quinn and inside of it was a note from a new bear, a lost Wisconsin bear, needing a new boy to love him.

6. I do not paint my fingernails. My nail beds are too short and nail polish just makes my hands look like I am ninety. Plus, in high school, a hot German exchange student told me that German girls never do such an ugly thing. Pretty sure that might have been false.

7. My dream “it’s never gonna happen career” would be to sing the hell out of things. For this lifetime, I am content to just sing out loud in my car.

8. I love pie. Homemade by my mom or brother or aunt Shirley pie. Fake pie is a crime. Store bought pie, ick. Real pie? Heaven. I learned this week that Haley’s favorite pie is her grandmother’s butterscotch pie, which I will now have to try.

9. I stopped eating sugar and yeast for a year and when we drove to Florida I ate sugar again. It started with a diet coke cave in about a month ago, so now that I am home I will have to start all over again. I have mixed emotions about this, mostly because of pie and rhubarb is in season and well, I really love toast.

10. I started to write a novel, but then I stopped. I wonder if it is still in me, hiding under some crevice, scared and waiting.

11. It has taken me a long time to not feel guilty about creating art and stories about such things as lost teddybears, when there are much more serious “save the world” kinds of things to be doing.

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Rule #2, my turn. Okay, peeps, I am nominating you. Less than 200 followers? You too? Aw, we gotta spread the word, people:

Um, wait. What? All of you have over 500 followers? I am shit. I am going to be disqualified because I follow only the popular people. Damn. I am sorry. #fail. Moving on.

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Questions asked to me by Valarie. Valarie with an A:

1. What is your favorite genre to read?

I am kind of in love with Gary Soto’s poetry and I reading Richard Brautigan makes me really happy. Poetry it is!

2. Have you ever gotten so angry with a book you’ve read, you quit reading that author entirely? (I have.)
I have only done this with movies, not books. My dad always insisted that I give any book at least 100 pages of my attention. I have left, bored, after that, but never angry. Though I will say that I just purchased an audio version of The Poisonwood Bible because Luke has to read that this summer for AP Lit and I thought it would be good to listen to on the road trip. I learned that I hate books on audio because I cannot visualize characters and drive simultaneously, and what fun is that?

3. When is your favorite time to write?

It doesn’t matter. I write when I need to find stillness and I guess that usually happens late at night. I am not a good “day” person and would be perfectly content to lose the hours between 2 and 6pm. I have never written anything then.

4. Have you always wanted to write, or did you happen upon it accidentally?

I have always, always, always, wanted to write. I kept my first illustrated journal when I was five and I always kept a diary of our family road trips, right down to the details of what everyone ordered for lunch. I am a born story teller, even if under 200 of you know that, it’s the God’s honest truth. Writing is no accident.

5. Do you write more often when you are angry, or happy?

Neither. Both. I write when what I have to say cannot be said with art. I write when I feel like I need a giant hug or a release on another level.

6. Give yourself a pirate name. What is it?

Jack.

7. Does your family know about your blog? Why or why not?

I am deeply connected to family. They pretty much all know how many times I sneezed today, so yes, YES, they know. In fact, it’s a big family. Aside from Valarie, they probably make up the majority of my followers. I am not sure if that is sad or fantastic.

8. Do you have a favorite author? Who is it?

I really do love Anne Lamott, but my all time favorite novel is Ordinary People.

9. Is there anything particular you consistently eat while reading or writing?

No, no … can’t mix two loves. Though, vodka does make an occasional showing.

10. Have you ever dressed up as your favorite book character? Who was it?

I hadn’t recalled this until you asked, but yes. In fourth grade, I dressed up as Willy Wonka for our school book fair. That is super embarrassing, but not as embarrassing as the time I sent Luke to school dressed as a giant black spider (a costume that took my husband all night long to fabricate) on the WRONG DAY. I did redeem myself four years later by creating Mary’s little lamb cupcakes for Elizabeth. I stayed up until four in the morning, rolling up miniature marshmallows to look like sheep fur.

11. Have you a horn to toot? Let us hear your song! Leave us your links!

Aw, you know ’em all. I am everywhere from Behance to Instagram to Etsy.

Tag, YOU ARE IT. If you are a small time blogger, send me your link and I will become your biggest fan.

XOXOXO K